Waiting is the Difficult Part…until you breathe

“Patience is power.

Patience is not an absence of action;

rather it is “timing”

it waits on the right time to act,

for the right principles

and in the right way.”

Fulton J. Sheen

Never one for being patient …it has seemed waiting for the therapist…waiting for healing …it has seemed that all I have been doing lately is waiting …and waiting …and …I think you get the point…

But the choice was to do things differently this time …to make lasting changes …to become the become a Master of my own life …and so it is …life itself has a timing …Edmund Burke said, “Our patience will achieve more than our force.”

“The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it.” ~Arnold H. Glasow

“Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.” ~John Quincy Adams

I am learning a different type of waiting …Yet, waiting itself can be extraordinary …I spent a great deal of wasted time not enjoying the moments of where I was …waiting for the thin version …the healthier version …to have an extraordinary magical moment where my fairy godmother would appear and make everything a perfect fairytale …or at least my version of one

I love this thought from Shauna Niequist, “Life is a collection of a million, billion moments, tiny little moments and choices, like a handful of luminous, glowing pearl. It takes so much time, and so much work, and those beads and moments are so small, and so much less fabulous and dramatic than the movies.” …yet each moment that we stop, live, and breathe “the moment” …the small “glowing pearl” that we skip over becomes a luminous wonder that is so enthralling that we can get lost and captivated by …afterwards tucking it away in our memories to pull out on less than spectacular days to brighten and warm our hearts …

As I wait for eye to heal …my second cataract surgery …it is a most miraculous Christmas present …wearing glasses since I was 8 years old …to be able to write these words without glasses slipping down my nose is a wonderment that makes my thoughts bubble …I am blessed

As I wait for my sessions with my therapist to help me grow and change …to wait for the prognosis on whether I might have Adult ADHD …as I wait for the medicine to clear my infection …there are many blessed and gracious moments that I could just let pass by and miss all the abundant blessings that surround me …

A loving husband that is supportive even though all the gunk of my life now …loving kids and grandkids that I will soon get to visit in about 6 weeks …finally after three years we get to fly home …and in sounding really dorky …the smell of the banana bread that I’m baking …here in South Africa, I see daily those that would be grateful to have that opportunity to enjoy …

Like the beautiful kudu that I was able to photograph just enjoying the morning rays …I too will sit and enjoy the moments …

The current plan is to fast the mornings …my therapist said that it was greatly beneficial and on most mornings, I am contented and not hungry till later in the day (which not everyone can do) …and it will help to start controlling the number of calories that I eat …doesn’t feel like a lot …but with the walking it is a healthy part to the lifestyle…

I was really surprised at her reaction (yes, my therapist is a woman) when after I said that I “hated” being overweight and went on about being beautiful and thin …her comment was “can’t voluptuous women be beautiful” …still chewing on that one …

I just feel healthier and happier at a lower weight …but does my obsession with a number on the scale detract from my joy of life …at the moment, it is a “yes”…something I am working on is loving myself where I’m at …the stress itself … the hormone cortisol is a huge factor in not losing weight …so science would seem to indicate …

Focusing on enjoying the treasures of the moment …the wonderfulness of just “being” …it’s a nice feeling not worrying …something I’ve spent my life doing …patiently waiting for life to beckon me further …

I cannot say it better than the quote from Shauna Niequist ….sending all the love, beauty and magic that your life can hold …❣

Beauty of the Quiet

“believe that this way of living, this focus on the present, the daily, the tangible, this intense concentration not on the news headlines but on the flowers growing in your own garden, the children growing in your own home, this way of living has the potential to open up the heavens, to yield a glittering handful of diamonds where a second ago there was coal. This way of living and noticing and building and crafting can crack through the movie sets and soundtracks that keep us waiting for our own life stories to begin, and set us free to observe the lives we have been creating all along without ever realizing it.

I don’t want to wait anymore. I choose to believe that there is nothing more sacred or profound than this day. I choose to believe that there may be a thousand big moments embedded in this day, waiting to be discovered like tiny shards of gold. The big moments are the daily, tiny moments of courage and forgiveness and hope that we grab on to and extend to one another. That’s the drama of life, swirling all around us, and generally I don’t even see it, because I’m too busy waiting to become whatever it is I think I am about to become. The big moments are in every hour, every conversation, every meal, every meeting.

The Heisman Trophy winner knows this. He knows that his big moment was not when they gave him the trophy. It was the thousand times he went to practice instead of going back to bed. It was the miles run on rainy days, the healthy meals when a burger sounded like heaven. That big moment represented and rested on a foundation of moments that had come before it.

I believe that if we cultivate a true attention, a deep ability to see what has been there all along, we will find worlds within us and between us, dreams and stories and memories spilling over. The nuances and shades and secrets and intimations of love and friendship and marriage an parenting are action-packed and multicolored, if you know where to look.

Today is your big moment. Moments, really. The life you’ve been waiting for is happening all around you. The scene unfolding right outside your window is worth more than the most beautiful painting, and the crackers and peanut butter that you’re having for lunch on the coffee table are as profound, in their own way, as the Last Supper. This is it. This is life in all its glory, swirling and unfolding around us, disguised as pedantic, pedestrian non-events. But pull of the mask and you will find your life, waiting to be made, chosen, woven, crafted.

Your life, right now, today, is exploding with energy and power and detail and dimension, better than the best movie you have ever seen. You and your family and your friends and your house and your dinner table and your garage have all the makings of a life of epic proportions, a story for the ages. Because they all are. Every life is.

You have stories worth telling, memories worth remembering, dreams worth working toward, a body worth feeding, a soul worth tending, and beyond that, the God of the universe dwells within you, the true culmination of super and natural.

You are more than dust and bones.

You are spirit and power and image of God.

And you have been given Today.”

― Shauna Niequist, Cold Tangerines: Celebrating the Extraordinary Nature of Everyday Life